It's Who You Know

If you catch the same train for long enough - & it really doesn't take long - you recognise the regulars, & their little groups. You also notice the loners. You're one of them, otherwise you'd be talking to a friend rather than staring at everyone else.

You can easily (without being self-conscious) catch snatches of conversation, or notice things about these people - the sort of things that you can verify with the next opportunity. You find out people's names, their habits, their occupation, even where they work. I've changed trains with a group of people for months at a time - even travelling to the same building via two trains - without doing any more than meet the eyes of these compatriots, these co-travellers, these (sometimes) unnamed friends.

Once you find out a name, though, yo have to be very careful not to use it - unless you want to make an impact. For example, one chap sits & does his emails & spreadsheets every morning on the way in. He sat next to me just the once, so I found out his name when I glanced at his screen & email signature. I kept meaning to ask why he never sat next to me again. Admittedly, he'd get more elbow room sitting next to a young lady, but it hurts that he saw me as a one-off stand-by travelling companion.

I'm not suggesting that you find out about people & then freak them out later by talking to them as if you actually did know their life story, but it's nice to know that you could. It gives you a certain amount of comfort knowing that you're actually travelling with friends - even if they don't realise how close you consider them to be.